Take Two, Two Weeks In

Dear Fellow Journeymen –

First, I have to say that I’m sorry that I’ve been *SO* remiss with the blog entries this time around… I’ve been reading all of your blogs and it really helps me to know and understand you and your goals.  I appreciate its importance and sorry to have been slacking on this part…

BODY – Feeling better in my own skin with each passing day.  I notice some moves are still as hard, others seem easier and I find myself trying Level 3 sometimes (real quick, like holding a hot potato) and then reverting back to Level 2… but even being able to do a move once at level 3 makes me happy.   

LEARNING – I have learned that it’s time for me to start supplementing my worxouts with some am cardio and yoga.  For lots of reasons:  Because I need the cardio.  Because my stamina is improving.  Because I have to get in the habit of getting some sweat equity in in the morning.  Because busy season is in full swing at work and if I work out in the morning, I’m good no matter how crazy the day gets.  Because I can start my body up right.  Because that’s what our coaches model for us.  Because until today I’ve really only been working out at the Worx and the lifestyle shift I’m trying to make requires that I get moving, somehow, every day and I’ve not been coming into the Worx every day.   

OH YEAH – Co-worker who’s been away for 6 weeks, my friend Talya, said I looked noticeably different to her… she must’ve been serious because she come to a few sessions at The Worx and is thinking of joining the next Journey.  Woot woot!

GOALS – I’m going on a 2 week work trip and I’m really looking forward to it personally and professionally…but I’m so so scurred of falling of the wagon in a dramatic and ugly way.  Sheesh.  Travel for me is like 25% legitimate challenges (plane food, long hours, eating out every meal, work lunches and dinners, not much chance to get out and about) and 75% free-for-all “I’m not at home so I’ll just indulge in all things all at once” mode.  Over the last few years, I’ve been spending sometimes up to half the year on work travel… given the ratio I just described, you can see how badly I need an intervention at the Worx, right?  OK.  But this time around, I am determined that things won’t go down like that.  My goal is – to maintain the progress that I’ve made.  Doesn’t sound like much, huh?  But if I can just maintain – I would be like over-the-moon happy.  It would be a first for me – for real, my suitcase has never been the only thing that seemed fuller on the way back, you know what I’m sayin?  Lol.  I’m planning to do measurements with my coach on Saturday and I leave Monday. 

SHOWING UP – Honestly, I really just wanted to write this blog because in the last couple of weeks, I’ve been motivated by literally everyone at the The Worx.  Starting with my awesome coach, Maia – who in the span of a couple of weeks fought off a nasty bug, sat for and passed her certification exam, and taught kick ass classes, all while juggling the day to day grind of work, fam, life.  Leading by example: check.  My fellow Journeyer Danielle – I believe Flo nicknamed us Ebony and Ivory, lol – who is steadily upping the ante with morning workouts, runs, doubling up workouts and whatnot.  Getting a text from her to say wake up, sleepyhead, has motivated me; so have her amazing results.  Then you have Flo, who’s a daily reminder that an ‘after’ is possible, but that you have to keep your head in the game… and that, over time, you’ll come to enjoy it.  I worked out with Nikki and Sadaf a few times – nothing like a coach all up in your circuit to push you through the burn, huh?  Then there’s Meredith who was kicking butt in her first ever kickboxing class, bringing it like she’s a regular.  There was Ron and Jamie who are in it to win it – pushing, reaching, showing up day in and out.  Our newest Journeyer Maria is leaving it all out on the floor, in those hardest first few days and weeks when everything is sore.  And I’ve been to several of Ashley’s workouts in the last two weeks; I have the sore arms to prove it.  Nicole, Jenn, Tamika, Tysha, Sarah, Monica, Tina, Kathy, Trayce, Sonia – seriously, I’m about to do a roll call up in here…I’ve been feasting on everyone’s energy and discipline the first two weeks of my second journey and I’m thankful to you all. 

The Worx is an unusual community in the world of fitness.  Believe me, I know.  I was a serial starter of workout programs and I’ve checked most of what’s out there in my past efforts to drop weight and get fit.  But there is something about the mix of excellence and encouragement, accountability and acceptance, challenge and camaraderie at the Worx that just worx – it’s really something special.  Feel blessed to have found this community! 

Let's GO Week 6

Off to a great start this week, with 9:15am bootcamp on Saturday, rest day on Sunday, and bootcamp Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.  It feels good to be able to get back on track after a lackluster Week 5, to not backslide into oblivion just because one week didn't go as planned...I fell down.  But this time, I got back up... mainly because I am in this community of people who are supportive and who encouraging and challenging... because I have team mates and a coach and people who are rooting for me to stand my ground and push through and suceed.  And for this I am SO appreciative.

My OH-YEAHs were most definitely yesterday (monday's) bootcamp class where I was able to do two moves that I just straight-up could NOT do 5.5 weeks ago.  First, the plank rows - I did them (though without weights) for the duration of the circuit.  When we started, I just could not balance my weight on one arm - I literally fell out of the move because I was putting all the pressure on my writs and was not using my core and I just could not withstand it on one hand (I could barely do it with both hands down).  But yesterday, I did it - it just happened, I didn't even realize that I was doing it until I was halfway through - what?!?!? OH YEAH, that's right - done and done.  Next time, I'm going to try with some weights...The second OH YEAH was when we were doing partner work in one of the stations where we were just holding in a low plank - I did that too!!!  for like the whole time...the first day I did that elbow plank, it looked more like a downward dog than a plank, lol, because the moment I would try to straighten out I would just start shaking like a polaroid picture (insert Andre 3000).  i'm dead serious...for real.  But yesterday, I held firm with good form for the entire circuit...there were somem shakes at the end, but I held it together.

I cooked this weekend too - made salmon and roasted veggies for lunch for 3 days this week and I have one lunch 1 lunch out and 1 dinner out this week and I already picked places and checked the nutrition facts online for what exactly I'm going to eat so I stay within my boundaries.  Figuring out this kind of stuff is important to me because everytime I've tried to lose weight in the past, I do these crazy fad diets and take on this all-or-nothing approach that makes me miserable and is unsustainable and ultimately ends in failure.  But if this time, I'm truly reaching out of my comfort zone and tyring something different and earnestly treating myself with love and respect and kindness - for me that means that YES of course I'll go shopping and dinner with my friend who's in from Rochester on Wednesday night, but I'll do it smart by getting on the treadmill at lunch, entirely avoiding the food court at the mall, and deciding from now where and what I'll eat that is legit and won't undo the sweat and tears (no blood...yet) I've put in.

Shout out to my coach Maia for some quality time on Saturday... a worXout plus lunch plus a lil' shopping makes for a lovely Saturday afternoon...

Month 1 is done

So at my mid-point mesurements, I had lost a respectable 2 pounds per week for a total of 4 pounds and just a couple of inches.  This was the same result I got last time - so halfway through the Journey I'm down 8 pounds total.  The beauty of this is is that beyond the pounds there are other changes in my body.  I feel better, more agile and flexible and my stamina is improving.  My clothes fit better - same clothes I've been wearing since I started but they just fit better.  One new weird thing going on is with my feet - they keep going numb during the warm ups.  It's happened a couple of times now and its really uncomfortable, painful even.  My mid-point good-to-myself treat is going to be a new pair of kicks.  The ones I wear now are a bit worn down and probably part of the problem.

What I'm struggling with this week - Week 5 - is staying consistent with the workouts.  I've been having a busy/rough week at work and in past weight loss attempts, I can literally point out the week/s or season where everything just went south.  Then it's like a snowball effect, just gets worse and worse, so it goes from a hectic day to an off week to a bad month.  I think I tend to be all or nothing about health and wellness - either I'm on the ball working out regularly and watching what I eat and taking vitamins and drinking lots of water - or I'm complete off the wagon, not working out, eating out or eating poorly, skipping vitamins, and not drinking enough water.  This week, I've only worked out twice at the Worx this week (Sat. and Mon.) and twice by myself (Tuesday and today - both at lunch because I knew I was going to be here late).  But for real, now that I've done the Worx classes it's hard to even count the workouts I do by myself.  I mean doing that is better than doing nothing, but honestly - I just need to make it to studio 5x a week, hell or high water. 

What inspired me this week, even though I haven't seen much of you guys, is just thinking about how others are fighting to make it work.  I'm only responsible for myself and I know some of our Journey-women are mothers to small children - they have to figure out their own stuff plus take care of their kids.  That thought always checks me and my thought process when I feel myself starting to lose focus, getting caught up in the day-to-day and getting distracted from my goals.

No big OH-YEAH moments for me this week; have just been on the grind and am feeling tired from long days and guilty from missing sessions and my lame by-myself workouts.  But tomorrow - I'm working out with my brother after work.  He's se-ree-aas in the gym so that will be quality time + a good workout...plus he's gonna help me pick out some new kicks!  I miss you guys!  But one thing I know - this one 'off' week is NOT going to turn into anything more than that.  I'll be at the Worx on Sat. ready to push as hard as I can.  Oh yeah.  

Stepping It Up

OK, people - now that my body has 21 days to adjust to the shock of regular high intensity worxouts I'm going into this week with an eye on form.  In Week 1, I was super winded at one point during a burpie and instead of just doing a modification I just kind hurled my body (despite our coach's repeated pleas for us to watch our form) and I hyperextended my elbow and pulled my right groin.  It's been sore ever since (though I've iced and stretched, etc).  That one sloppy move has caused a lot of discomfort; really reminds me that form is king, especially now that my stamina is starting to improve.

So now, looking toward our mid-point on Saturday, I want to start focusing on form.  My goal is to be more deliberate and precise in my movements; so I am really using the muscles I am supposed to be using and I get the full benefit of the move.  I mean the way I see it, doing the moves without precision is like leaving money on the table in a deal - it's just a waste.  Up to this point, my goal has not been proper form, it's honestly just been to keep moving - to not stop, to not give up, to not give in... I am still in that zone and will be here for some time...(um, yeah - our warm-up to me is still so *not* a warm up, lol) but I want to start practicing - with my mind and my body - doing the exercises in the right way.    This is going to be a long term goal for me as my stamina keeps improving... to use proper form.

I had a couple of OH-yeah moments this week.  First was when I was running for the bus one day - the same distance of like 2 blocks slightly uphill made me feel less winded.  Like, noticeably less winded.  I mean I was still out of breath when I got onto the bus, but I've done that same run several times before and this time was different.  As I sat down, I thought dang - if I can feel a noticeable difference in less than 21 days, how awesome is that?  How much more can my body do, if I keep this up?  What??!!!  I was pretty psyched.  The second moment was when I saw my aunt - who I hadn't seen since Chrismas - and she said I looked like I lost weight.

Here's to 4 more great worxouts before Day 30. 

The Real Thing

Here we go - Week 3!

B - Tried kickboxing during Week 2 and I really liked it.  Brought back memories of doing Tae Bo in the basement of my house in high school (I have seriously been trying to lose weight since puberty).  I feel lighter on my feet with each passing day.  Still feel that deep burn / side stitch at the end of our 'warm-ups' and am still doing modifications and level 1 stuff - but feeling surer and steadier with each day.  woot!!!

L - We had our 2 week measurements on Saturday - and to be honest, I had to fight the feeling of disappointment.  Not sure quite what I was expecting...I think all the years of fad dieting and yo-yo-ing has really affected my sense of what real, sustainable progress is - what it feels like, what it looks like, the pace at which it happens, etc.  I was feeling great all week, feeling in control and proud, even.  But as soon as I saw my math, I was blown.  Like it just wasn't good enough, wasn't appropriately dramatic.  Was really kind of bummed about it, but you know what gave me some much needed perspective?  I sat and thought about the crazy (I mean cray-cray) stuff I was doing when I lost a dramatic amounts of weight in the past and I remembered how bad it felt every time the pounds crept back on...short lived success followed by public, painful failure.  I'm resolved that I won't play that game anymore...but managing my expectations about what real progress is, about what it takes...still learning and figuring that part out.

O - Success in week 2 was on prepping my food for the week ahead of time and posting photos.  And best of all every night after my workout, I would come home, have my protein shake, and call it a day.  It's like, after worxing out and giving it all I've got, I just can't bring myself to eat something that isn't deserving - you know?  It just seems extra, extra trifling to literally undo all the good I've done by eating something that isn't worthy - like what in the world would be the point of that?  All that stuff we talked about at the nutrition seminar, treating my body like a lambo and not a dump truck, etc just keeps running through my head.  Pretty basic idea, huh??  But getting that and living it out in week 2 - definitely my oh-yeah for the week.   

G - Week 3 training goals: 5 sessions at the Worx.  Week 3 nutrition goals: trying one new, healthy recipe.

S - Fellow journey peeps:  I was off FB in 2012 and just got back on to be part of the Journey group.  SO glad I did it because it is making all the difference!  (Can't believe that at first, I was thinking at first that I would just come to class but not join the online group...)  These days, if I'm wavering about a food choice or I want instant camaraderie or I need a new recipe or want some inspiration - I just check out a few posts and it reminds me of what I'm doing, why I'm doing it, and that I'm not alone!  thanks for the sharing guys!!!  Also - shoutout to Sadaf and Maia - two awesome Journey coaches that I worxed out with during bootcamp classes in Week 2:  encouragement + challenge = kick ass workouts. 

Bring it on, Week 2

Week 1 is done.  Let's go Week 2! 

B - Week one was a wake up call for my body.  Literally everything hurt; I would come back from the Worx and plop down on my mat and foam roller... you know how you are supposed to wait at any spot where there is pain?  Um, yeah - I stopped along every square inch of my body... But I even though I was sore for most of the week, I already notice some positive changes:  I feel lighter and looser in my body, am less bloated, and a lot less stiff.  Woot! 

L - On fitness: I've learned that my mind says no before my body does.  There have been a couple moments of exhaustion, where I really did have to stop; but there are lots more more moments where I think something is too hard before I've even tried it.  Working on an attitude of YES, I can.  On nutrition: I've learned that I have to make time and room to cook and prepare my meals for the whole week ahead of time if this is going to be a sustainable lifestyle change.  I spent Week 1 doing veggie juicing and eating a lot of small minimeals that didn't require cooking.  But I have to make the effort to cook real meals that are healthy and balanced.  

O - Felt amazing to stop and think for a minute that this is really happening, that right now, with each day bad habits are being/going to be broken and good ones are being formed instead.  Feel a real sense that I can win; oh yeah, it's happening.  For real.    

G - A couple of goals for the week.  First, I've been remiss on updating my nutrition so my goal is to post my food at least once daily.  Also - in Week 1, I did 4 sessions at the Worx and 1 elliptical workout on my own.  For Week 2, I want to get 5 sessions at the Worx.

S - Every day I walk into the Worx, I feel like I'm among friends, like I'm with people I've known for ages, when in reality we met a week ago!  I think that is an amazing testament to the good will and energy of the coaches and team members at the Worx - am very grateful to get to be a part of it. Also - I am totally loving the inspiration on food prep and meal planning from lots of other team mates on the Journey.  Thanks guys.

Let's start at the very beginning...a very good place to start

01.05.13: Day 1.  Not my first Day 1, not my second or third either.  My 'journey' here has been littered with lots of false starts, lots of attempts which invariably led to lots of failures.  Whatever success I've had has always been short-lived; backsliding right back to square one, oftentimes worse off than I was before I ever tried in the first place.  So I keep grappling with the question - what is going to be different this time around?  Seriously - why will this time be better???  All I can come up with to answer this question is the simple fact that I am more sick and tired of being overweight and out of shape than I've ever been and that my 'fed up' feeling is bigger than the ease, comfort, convenience, etc of staying this way.  And, this program features something my previous attempts don't have: accountability.  During the first workout, I discovered something else that this class has: serious intensity!!!  I couldn't even complete the fit test... I was super winded so I hyper-extended my knee as I landed from a jump and did a slow motion fall and twisted my ankle a bit along the way.  So I just stopped with the around-the-world jumps and massaged and flexed my knees and ankles...because I know very well how this story could end.  I've injured myself before and then will be out for the count for days or weeks.


01.06.13: Day 2.  My whole body hurts; I feel like I've been in some sort of fight, like I got beat down...except I haven't.  Well, not unless you count yesterday's workout/fit test as a battle between me and my worst self, the parts of me that are equal parts insecure and lazy and wounded and afraid and defeatist.  I arrived for the workout today with a sense of fear - I could barely sit down and stand up without wincing so how on earth was I going to work out??  But your body will surprise you - mine sure did.  Yes, I almost keeled over during the 'warm-up.'  Yes, I had a raging stitch in my side in the second cycle and turned burnt orange by the third cycle.  But still:  I was still standing at the end of 15 minutes - which was already more than I thought I could do.  Once we got to the stations: every single thing was hard; all of it, bar none.  But the worst for me was anything that required getting on the ground and back up again.  Moves like that are challenging for me not because of stamina or endurance, but simply because of my physical bulkiness...my stomach is literally in the way.  I'm sure many of you guys can't relate to that - but that is my honest truth about why a burpie or floor crawls are such a challenge: I am literally, physically unable to curl myself up into a ball.  My God, how did I get here, to this awful and embarrassing place?  Not to mention that abdominal fat is the worst kind for your health...makes me want to holler that something has GOT to be done about this...and then I remember that I am - finally - doing something about it.  So step aside, lactic acid.


01.07.13: Day 3.  Today is Christmas for Orthodox Christians, so I know I will go from work to my uncle's house for a feast.  This is going to be one of my no exercise days and plus, I'm going to be in a food danger zone at dinner.  Before I set foot into my uncle's house, I had already decided what I was going to eat - and my goal was to eat that and nothing more, no matter what the spread looked like or what else was offered.  I'm not even working out today - so what I put in my body is all the more critical.  Happy to report that it went well; stuck to my plan and felt so good knowing that Day 3 didn't undo the good of the first two days.